Forgiveness… Something that, for me, seems to be very tricky. But in the past week God has been trying to get me to learn how to forgive not only others but myself as well. Forgiving others comes fairly naturally for me. Forgiving myself not so much. I have a bad habit of holding onto things and that never ends well.
Last year I dated this guy. He wasn’t good for me and I made a lot of bad choices. Over the past year I have done everything in my power to become the person I was made to be. There are only two things in my way.
1. I haven’t forgiven myself
2. I haven’t forgiven him.
This year I am living my best year yet, except for those two things. I thought that I would be fine since this guy moved but then COVID-19 happened. Now we work together almost everyday and I have to see him. I don’t know about anyone else but it is very hard to work with someone and be nice to them when you haven’t forgiven them. It’s even harder to forgive them when I haven’t forgiven myself. I still consider myself a bad person anytime I mess up or get something wrong. I hold myself to unreasonably high expectations and when I don’t meet my own standards I feel a great deal of guilt.
So this week God has been nudging me (AKA smacking me upside the head) to forgive not only him but myself too. So that is my challenge to everyone. If you are not forgiving someone for something that happened I ask that you consider it. Forgiveness is a way to get rid of a lot of anger and hate. It is very freeing. After you have done this you can really begin to live the life you love.
Remember, Every little thing is gonna be okaye.